Stoned
by goldenlanterns
Summary: Wisdom teeth are removed from Wisdom's daughter and Percy gets embarrased a lot by her dopey flirting


**_So this is random. (Curse warning, like, once) Annabeth gets her wisdom teeth removed and Percy gets confused._** ** _I got to the end of this and my imagination kind of ran away with me so yeeah._**

As soon as Percy got there, he became fully aware that Annabeth was stoned.

The dentist who lead him to a back room explained that his assistant gave Annabeth too much of the pain killers. Percy was feeling panic set in as the doctor opened the last door in the pale blue hall.

When Percy came around the chair to look at her, he didn't know how he was going to handle this with his mom out of town.

Annabeth's ponytail was falling to one side and her mouth was stuffed with cotton but Percy could still make out a dopey smirk, "There he is! My future husband!" Her shoulders came up to her ears like she was being tickled but she held Percy's gaze, "Didn't I tell you he was handsome?"

With a blush, Percy glanced at the dentist who seemed unfazed, "You sure did." His tone was light, a practiced friendliness with an underlying annoyance.

"Did you see his eyes? That's the best part. He's pretty but his eyes are extra pretty." Annabeth held out her hands with a general _gimme_ gesture, "C'mere, I wanna kiss you."

Percy was red as a tomato, holding his neck, "Um. Not right now." He looked at the doctor, "What do I need to do?"

The man was removing his rubber gloves, "Just let her sleep it off, she'll be fine after a nap."

"Okay, thank you." Percy held out his hand, "Come on Wise Girl, I've gotta get you home."

Annabeth took his hand and stood up with some difficulty, grinning, "I remember the last time you said that." She didn't elaborate, but she didn't need to.

Percy held her waist all the way to the Prius and then buckled her for good measure.

She laughed and tried to pull him on top of her in the passenger seat but Percy had a good grip on the door frame and held back.

Annabeth groaned, "You're so pure." She complained.

Normally, Percy would've reminder her of their anniversary last month, just to fluster her, but now he felt like that would be against some sort of rule as she could hardly form a coherent thought.

Percy kissed her nose without a word and shut her door, going to the driver's side. Once on the road, Percy realized he didn't have enough gas to get back to the apartment.

Percy decided that taking Annabeth inside the gas station was better than leaving her at her own whim to jump out of the Prius. So he held her up the best he could and they walked to the doors.

"Hey, are you hungry for anything?" Percy asked her, looking at the rows of snacks.

His mom had bought a few things that Percy and Paul could manage with out her but Percy didn't know how much of it was numb-mouth-friendly or whatever.

"Hum." Annabeth said thoughtfully, then plucked a bag of Cheetos off the shelves, swinging her arm and knocking half of the row down, "Oops."

"I've got it." Percy assured her, picking up the bags of chips and putting them above the tags that might have been wrong, Percy couldn't really remember.

When he finished and turned around, his girlfriend was gone, "Annabeth?" He questioned loudly, jumping to see over the aisles.

He spotted her over by the slurpee machine.

"Sweet Jesus."

Percy fast walked to her side as she happily pumped in all sorts of colors, "What are you doing?"

"Slushies!" She announced with glee, handing him a messy cup of blue liquid, "I already made yours. It's blue because you like that."

Percy took a napkin from the dispenser before taking the drink in his hands, "Thanks."

Annabeth beamed, giving him the Cheetos to hold as well and then turning back to her rainbow concoction, pumping pink lemonade.

"What's that?" Percy questioned, just because it was probably going to be a funny answer.

"A pershie." She responded simply, "Percy slushie, pershie."

Percy was smiling with his eyebrows raised, "How?"

Annabeth poked the side of her cup, showing the different layers, "Green for your eyes, orange for your camp shirt, brown for your hair because Coke is the darkest flavor, blue for the canoe lake and pink for your mouth."

"That looks disgusting."

"Pink tastes the best." But instead of sipping her drink, Annabeth leaned to press a kiss to his lips.

Percy would be the first to admit, even though the cotton rubbed his cheeks weird and her mouth was kind of slobbery, his heart fluttered with contentment.

Annabeth laughed, "You're so cute. I love you."

He gave her a smile, "I love you too. Do you want anything else?"

She shook her head and then somewhat pranced to the check out. Percy put the food down and the college girl worker kind of shot him an amused look and he shrugged.

"He's already mine, bitch." Annabeth said. It would've been scary if she hadn't said bitch like 'bith'.

The girl looked honestly confused as Percy blushed a fire truck red, "Sorry. She just had her wisdom teeth removed and she's a little looney. Twenty on six please."

Worker lady seemed to understand, "Oh." She laughed once, "My brother was cussin' up a storm when he had his wisdom teeth taken out. Twenty-four-o-eight."

Annabeth giggled, "Wisdom teeth. Huhuh. Get it? Because Athena is my mom?"

Percy handed the young woman money, "You're hilarious Wise Girl." Deadpan.

"Wise Girl." Annabeth repeated, "That's funny. Because Athena, you know? And the gods?"

Percy took his change and put it in his jacket pocket and grabbed their snacks, "Shh. That's a secret." He reminded her.

She giggled, holding a finger to her lips, "Shhhhh." And then she drank some pershie and held his hand.

Back at the apartment, he settled Annabeth into his bed and kissed her forehead, sitting on the side.

She smiled but whined, "That's it? I'm hormonal and dying over here."

He laughed but shook his head, "Now you know how I feel."

"Tell me a story." She begged.

"Once upon a time, there were three little pigs . . ."

"Not that story, I'm not a baby." But cuddled up in his bed with a drowsy lisp, she sure did seem like one in the best way.

"It's different, I promise. So the pigs were named, Piggy, Oinker and Annabacon and Piggy was in big trouble because the farmer, Zeus, thought Piggy had stolen his lucky shovel. Piggy didn't even know who Zeus was but he wanted to clear his name, so his best friend Oinker and him decided they would go find the lucky shovel. Annabacon was the prettiest and smartest but also the scariest pig that Piggy had ever met but he didn't mind her so he, Oinker and Annabacon set out to find the shovel . . ."

" . . . And so Piggy fell into the water, already feeling like bacon bits . . ."

" . . . Annabacon looked at Piggy like he was the dumbest pig to walk the earth. _Because you're my friend Pork Brain, got anymore stupid questions?_ . ."

" . . . _I'm going to pulverize you_ the big bad wolf said, his red eyes glowing. _Not if I pulverize you first_ Piggy snapped back. It wasn't a very smart thing to say to a wolf but Piggy didn't care . . ."

" . . . And so that's how Piggy, Oinker and Annabacon managed to save the world."

Annabeth was out like a rock, sleeping sounding in Percy's blankets. He kissed her forehead again, smiling to himself like an idiot.

"Sweet dreams Annabacon."


End file.
